Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Homemade Apple Pie

Homemade Apple Pie
Originally uploaded by wayfarer.
This is what happens when two women who love to cook get together... My mom and I made this with the bag of apples I picked up at the Apple Festival up in the mountains of Georgia. Delish! I'll post the recipe on my food blog soon...and will share more pictures and news from her visit. :-)


Keep meaning to post about my mom's visit but i keep getting distracted... today's distraction: Netflix! I've been using the library for dvd's etc for about 5 years now and have learned the art of patience of waiting for a movie. Well, those days are over. I built one heck of a queue...basically anything i've wanted to see in the last five years that the library didn't have...lots of foreign films, etc. Ah, and now the luxury of being able to see new releases as soon as they are out instead of waiting a couple months to a year...as was the case for Syriana. I will be listening for the mailman's squeaky brakes even harder now.

The other thing that is distracting me is crocheting and dear me, i just picked up a how to knit book at the library along with a few about baby crafts and a kazillion books for LD. I haven't been to the library program for a month.

Off to the next distraction... Beef and Potato Curry.

BTW...my LD is finally back to his "normal" nap schedule which means he's at least taking them. Wooooo hooooooooo! While the cat is napping, momma gets to play! Can i get an alhamdulillah?

Monday, October 30, 2006


A couple months ago I was at the library and Little Dude was being a little cranky. Another mom in line was giving me a look of "shut your child up" while her baby sat content in his stroller. Well today, me and Little Dude went to get some yarn (what else lol) from the craft store and guess who I saw there? That exact woman. She was holding her child while he was screaming and screaming. A lady walked past me and nudged me (Little Dude was sitting very content in his stroller minding his own business) and said, nodding towards this lady, a comment about her child needing to leave the store. I ignored her comment because quite frankly, I've learned a lot being a mom, most of all, it ain't easy being one - and most women need to learn to give other women in general, a break. Women are often way too judgmental and cruel to one another. Especially when it comes to raising children. I think they forget how hard it is.

I remember one time I went to the farmers market here - it was 90 some degrees outside and LD was dressed in shorts and a t-shirt. I wasn't thinking ahead of going to the farmers market but stopped on the way home from doing something else. It's cold in there but I hadn't thought of it that day because it was so hot outside. Being cold in their I was going quickly and just grabbing what i needed - a short trip. Anyway, in the dairy aisle i was getting yoghurt and this older lady glared at me and said very loud to LD "What a mean Mommy you have. I feel so sorry for you. You are just freezing aren't you" and then turned to her friend and said loud "I can't believe she has her little baby in here. That's just abuse." And then she FOLLOWED me to the cashier - probably to see if I was going to lock my son in a car with the windows rolled up on the 90 degree day. I was so stressed out that day already having to make this extra stop. LD was 9 months or so, so he wasn't a newborn, but yeah, he was chilled, but by no means freezing.

People offer criticism so easily, but not once do they offer to help or even try to understand. It's like they totally forgot what it takes to be a mom. It can be so stressful and then when someone adds stress on top of it, it's frustrating. I remember one time at the airport too, I was flying on a Friday evening which means lots of business travellers - which by the way - I hate flying with...they are the worst at this. Anyway, a big mouth guy said looking at my quiet, pacifier sucking son and said "I hope he stays quiet like that on the plane...snicker snicker snicker." I said with a deadpan face "I hope the same about you." His face went red. I won't even talk about the time my husband let me take his first class seat while he few coach (they had automatically upgraded him without asking him if he wanted to be not realizing i was travelling with him)...anyway, i sat down and the business guy let out a big stressful sigh of "oh great!" and then when LD almost knocked over his beer (sitting on the middle section between us) he "humphhhhed" - i just got up and went back to coach and said forget it. Travelling with kids is hard but travelling with businessmen is even harder.

Wow, this is a long rant. I was just going to mention the craft store thing and look how out of hand this got. Anyway, the lady at the craft store was the same one from the library... I smiled sympathetically at her knowing how she felt and she just glared..at me and her kid. I could only think that it was karma. You really do get what you give.

Thursday, October 26, 2006


I just got a call from a producer of the Oprah show. There is a slight possibility that I'll be flying out next week to film for the show. How's that for fifteen minutes of fame?

Okay, back to crocheting. I'm hooked...geez i crack myself up.

And a late Eid Mubarak late to my wondeful readers too...

Saturday, October 21, 2006


LD is asleep in his crib (!), husband is out getting a haircut, maids are downstairs cleaning*** ... what do i do with myself? If i'm lucky, they'll leave before the husband gets back so i can run around the house doing a happy dance. Mom flies in tomorrow. All that's left is go halaal meat shopping and farmers market shopping....trying to figure out what to cook since we eat mostly pak food around here. I don't want to take her to the halaal store because i'm sure we'd end up having another conversation like this or this one. ;-)

***I should clarify...we have them clean once a month...i do it the rest of the time.

Friday, October 20, 2006


My mom is coming to visit for a week to see her grandson for the first time. Neither of my parents have seen their grandchild yet my inlaws have seen him several times including the six weeks surrounding his birth. We sent my mom a plane ticket and i still can't believe she's going to make the trip. I've offered the same to my father and he'll be coming insh'Allah in November.

It hurts me in a way that they didn't see him sooner. Not in a very personal way, but in the way of "no wonder i'm a little messed up with relationships way" - not that i don't have any good relationships but it wouldn't be an exageration to say that i find it hard to make to get comfortable around new people and make friends but if i hit it off with someone, i tend to keep that friend forever. I can count my true friendships on one, well maybe one and a half hands.

I attribute my lack of female connections to the fact that my father raised me and he was not home a lot so i spent a lot of time alone as a child. From the age of 4, i actually stayed home alone on my own. I'm appalled at this now since i would never leave my children alone at that age but at the time, for me it seemed normal that i walked home from school, put my key in the lock, turn on the tv, make a sandwich for myself and plop myself in front of the tv and then to fall asleep on the couch looking out the window waiting for my dad to come home. Part of it is my fault - i kicked babysitters in the shins a lot so it was hard for him to find someone to watch me. I was always mature for my age, probably because of my sisters death (i was 4).

I saw my mother rarely, i received birthday cards with a $20 bill, and each summer a bus ticket to where she lived 5 hours away. I still can't believe my parents put me on a bus alone at the age of 5 to travel 5 hours alone. I would never let my child do that. The world was not that different back then. There were creeps on the greyhound buses and even though they made me sit towards the front of the bus and asked the driver to keep an eye on me, that didn't usually happen and most of the time, the driver looked pretty creepy himself. Thank God nothing ever happened to me because it very well could have. All of these things also made me tough - people don't think i'm tough because i'm also overly sensitive...interesting combination and it makes it difficult to *really* get to know me.

Over the years, i've developed a relationship with my mother and my father and we've worked through things and have all become better people over the years. Having said all this, my mother has never been to a home of mine. This will be the first time ever she sees my life in action. When you see someone's home, you learn a lot about them. Boy this post has gotten out of hand and way too personal hasn't it?

Long story short: my mom has always crocheted, well until she got rheumatory arthritis, so this week i've learned the basic crochet stitches so we can crochet a blanket together for the Little Dude. It's a big deal to me. She's not doing well healthwise and only has a few years left, if that. We've already said our goodbyes, her asking for forgiveness and apologizing for any wrongdoing, my praying that she believes in God and asks God for foregivness for her sins before she passes and just appreciating the fact that i do have a mother that loves me, maybe not in the ideal way, but still, i know she does.

This blanket we crochet will be much more than needles and yarn, i'm sure there will be tears, love, forgiveness, healing, and insh'Allah laughter while we make it. The Little Dude may not know that when i snuggle it around him when he sleeps, craving that mother's embrace myself, that he is being surrounded by the love of his mother and his grandmother.

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Mean mommy

So, irritated at the stumbling irritable sleep deprived little dude, i tossed (gently laid him down - yeah right lol - like i said, tosssed) him in his crib and let him cry it out. It's just too out of hand around here. The neighbors are complaining about the smell coming from my house ;-). I sleep trained LD when he was 6 months old and he was great after a week and i don't really want to do it again right now because he has so much going on - his lovely new found legs that get faster and faster, two new teeth and molars coming in, less milk than he's used to, and a bad case of seperation anxiety...he's always hanging on me and he's heavy but enough is enough! He just fell asleep in fifteen minutes of crying which is much better than my attempt the other day (an hour) when i gave in. This is the first time in almost three weeks that he's slept in his crib. I pray it lasts at least an hour. Time to do a mad dash around the house and get some stuff done!

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Sleep deprived

I'm soooo tired. LD is being difficult these days. He just won't sleep or nap. For instance, last night he slept from 8 until 1. Woke up around 1 and wouldn't go back to sleep until 3. Then he woke up again at 5 and wouldn't go back to sleep until 7. That means i got even less sleep because i'm up with him and then i can't go back to sleep because i'm uncomfortable because either he's hogging the bed or pulling my hair. He won't sleep alone now and has really bad seperation anxiety. I've given up on the milk thing, that being the least of my battles. But i really need him to sleep at night and to take naps and he won't do either. It all started on our trip and when he began walking good. Right now, he passed out on the floor playing. He won't take a nap but he'll pass out like this for 20 or so minutes out of sheer exhaustion. I don't know if i should move him and risk waking him up but think he'd sleep better in his room although if his head touches his crib he usually wakes up instantly...it's like he has a sixth sense or something. Or do i leave him sleeping on the floor and pray he takes a good nap. Sigh. This has been going on for two weeks and i'm seriously sleep deprived as is he. His eyes look so tired - the poor guy. Has anyone else gone through this? What do i do???

Bad things from the trip:

-No longer sleeps
-Doesn't like as much food and likes to throw food or shove it in mom's face
-Gets into everything! I say no, he takes it as "go faster, she's gonna get me" and if i pull him away from something he pulls my hair and/or bites my wrist.
-No sleep for mom or LD
-Takes things and hides them from me
-When we got his haircut from a kid's place, they first dropped him on his head and then when we were leaving we noticed a big long scratch/cut across his neck, bleeding enough to form a scab hours later. I felt like such a bad mom because he was fine in the beginning and then things went downhill but i was trying to keep him distracted so they could finish but he was screaming and i couldn't figure out why, then i knew. I was so mad. When they called the next (in fear of a lawsuit i believe) my mother in law gave them an earful, something my mil doesn't do. She said she was going to call the police on them.
-His curls are gone now too. :-(
-Has learned that burping is funny - this one from his cousin

Good things from the trip:

-Says a bunch more words (car, vroom, up, hadi/hathi (either his cousin or elephant in urdu - not sure which since cousin hadi was acting like LD's elephant toy for a couple days), peekaboo, e-i-e-i e-i-e-i without the o singing old macdonald, etc.
-Dances (so cute!). He'll stand there and swing his hips and shoulders. Loves qawali.
-Two new teeth
-Walking like a mad man
-Does the wheels on the bus motions
-Went to the playground for the first time
-Learned how delicious kitchry is
-Ah, and i learned a new dessert (egg hawla), a new dish (tomatar ka salan), and a new way of making rice as well as a new way of making daal.

I'm sure there's much more to tell but with my sleep deprivation, my mind is only half here. Now i must get a few things done before my naughty one wakes up and graces me with his presense.

Monday, October 16, 2006

I was SOOOO wrong...

it was ME who had no idea what i was in for... Recovering. More soon.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

My inlaws have no idea what they are in for...

When LD gets an eyefull of their place, their plants, their trinkets... oh dear, i see days of busy chasing. At least there will be three of us to contain him. I look forward to seeing my inlaws. They've been out of the country for over three months and LD has changed so much since we last saw them. They are going to be amazed. He's walking (Frankenstein like, but still) and babbling and talking. We love his hawlo (hello). All morning I've been packing as he unpacks. Hate the flying part but look forward to some time away. It's funny but I see my inlaws more than my husband does. He goes for a weekend, I go for a week or more. Isn't that strange? What's even stranger is that i never see my parents. I see his parents a lot and mine hardly ever.

Sunday, October 01, 2006

How is it possible....

that LD will eat butter chicken, chicken curry, okra dry fry or any other spicy thing that may make some run for the hills but giving him anything white in a bottle or cup will get said bottle or cup thrown at you, spit out on you and if a drop happens to get in his mouth he'll shiver like it's the nastiest thing he's ever tasted and then throw the cup down. Stubborn stubborn boy.

Today's episode was particularly amusing because i was determined and wrestled him for it. He won and then saw the bottle sitting there, shook his head no and laughed. Sad thing is i know he's going to win because he's got my temperament and like me, he knows how to get his way with this. I pity the fool. Especially when the fool is me. And guess who has to drink his nasty warm leftover milk because she doesn't want to waste food, especially during Ramadan. You got it. So said milk has a second life of getting coffee added to it and some dulce caramel syrup. I'm starting to see why he doesn't like after two weeks of this. :-/

Here's one of my infamous "theories" (only my husband knows what i mean) - when i was pregnant i craved milk bad. I never cared for milk much but when pregnant i would go through a gallon every two days. That's a lot of milk and probably how i ended up with a nine pound baby. See, you finally get a prego story since i kept my pregnancy off the blog until after baby. Anyway, i craved milk so bad that one night when my husband was out of town and i couldn't send him to the store to get it and i wasn't leaving because i was still pretty new to atlanta and we lived in midtown and well midtowners kinda freaked me out so i wouldn't go. I stayed awake until 8am, at 8 i got my big belly in the car and drove to Krispie Kreme, went through the drive through and ordered two things of milk and two doughnuts to wash it down with ;-). I went back home chugging the milk on the way. With my craving combatted i fell into a nice deep sleep. Maybe he's just sick of cow's milk.

the future of islam